Tag Archives: happiness

Happiness

What is happiness really?

I’m, pretty sure I have found the secret to happiness.. Or at least the secret to my own happiness. It’s all about your mind, heart and soul.

Happiness is when all of these aspects of your being are in sync. When they are all at peace you attain happiness. But when one of them is out of sync, when your heart hurts, your soul and your mind lose focus, they become conflicted, confused because one piece of you is not well. When your soul hurts you lose passion, you lose peace and your mind and heart feel drained, you feel tired all the time, you can not be the same as you were before. And because of that your body also become tired, unable to go on the same as before.

So if you want to attain that happiness again, you have to find the peace, and the only way to find the peace is to go back to doing that give you passion, the things that bring you laughter and joy. To take a break and just feel everything that you need to feel. To not bottle up feelings because when they eventually come out they will overwhelm you, they will over flow and you will not know what to do, how to control and capture them.

Find your peace and you will find your happiness…

The Art of Adult Friendships…

Friendship…… It is such an interesting phenomena isn’t it?

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I mean you meet this person who you know absolutely nothing about and suddenly there is a click. Like this person was meant to be in your life. Like somehow their destinies coincided with your destinies and just like that you have one destiny, and just like that you have made a choice, an unconscious choice that they are the ones you want to spend time with, the ones you want to share all your crazy meltdowns, experience life with, tell all your secrets because you know they will not judge you. These two souls attach to each other and just shut every other soul out.

You know even if they do not understand they will still love and appreciate you even though you are a messed up little weirdo they still stay by your side and embrace the crazy.

But it is not always rainbows and lollipops. Sometimes after you have been friends with the one you thought understood your insanity something happens to tear you apart, the trick is it is easy to make a friendship but hard as balls to maintain it. Some think making the friendship is the end, but really it should be the beginning, because the moment you stop watering and nourishing that friendship it turns stale. Then you find yourselves as strangers, sad strangers who knew each other for years then one day do not know or even like each other anymore. Sad strangers who might then become enemies, sad strangers who grow apart and end up doing things to hurt each other or even just the ignoring each other and pretending they never knew each other. I think that is the most painful of the situations, when you no longer know the person you used to know, the person you used to share everything with, to laugh with, to cry with, because when they disappear from your life all that is left is emptiness where they used to reside. An emptiness and loneliness and painful memories of what once used to be.

But do not despair, because with the emptiness comes the opportunity to make lifelong friends who will never turn to strangers, those who are in it for the long haul, who will ride or die with you, who will understand you so much that you will realize that those previous ones did not know you at all. Because you will realize that with these new ones you can completely be yourself, you can trust that they really do like you just the way you are and know that for as long as both of you will live they will be by your side, advising you when you need it, scolding you when you get out of line and supporting you if the situation allows and showing you how to be more you and them more themselves.

Six years into the notorious 20s, I’ve come to some conclusions about adult friendships,through my readings and my experiences I have realized that there are some things you need to understand and accept about friendships:

  1. Not Everyone Will Love You and Not Everyone Hates You. Some people won’t stick around forever but that doesn’t make you less loveable. The thing with human beings is that we are so damn complex. We can be a glass of fresh water to one person and a bottle of vinegar to another — no matter what our personality is.
  2. Not Everything is About You. In this voyeuristic time of constant social interaction and connection, we’ve become paranoid because everyone is watching. We’ve also become obsessed with ourselves. Think about it, for the past several years most of us have been documenting our lives for all to see. It’s tough not to be somewhat of a narcissist. However, no matter how great you are at deciphering supposed sub-tweets and virtual jabs — not everything is about you
  3. Don’t Fake the Funk. Frenemies are ageless but I aim to keep dodging these sort of relationships in years to come. I used to be so good at smiling and enjoying the company of others who I know just finished roasting me in a private shade session. Life too stressful to be worrying about the loyalty of your friends
  4. See People for Who They Really Are, Not for Who You Want Them to Be. This realization is for the long-timers. One of the most annoying parts of adulthood is that everyone grows up so differently.  Some go at a much faster pace than others. Some go into different directions. You have to see your friend for who they are and love them for it. If you went into a creative field and your friend is climbing the traditional corporate ladder, support their dreams. Don’t chastise them based on your own ideals and goals.
  5. Remember Why You Became Friends. Unfortunately, sometimes we end friendships — voluntarily or involuntarily. No matter the cause of the break-up, never forget your former friend is and will always be the person who you once liked
  6. It’s OK to Have Your Own Life. Sometimes we think in order to be a good friend we have to stifle ourselves. It’s ok to grow up and have your own life. It’s ok to move away
  7. Speak as Much as You Can, Even if It Isn’t Often. I think sometimes we put too much pressure into what makes an ideal friend. Face it, most of us are standing on unfamiliar ground right now, whether the ground be a new city, new job or just a new lifestyle. Again, being self-absorbed youths we expect our friends to be there and ready for us 24/7. We all want the same thing but aren’t always willing or able to give it back — that’s ok. The best we can do is give the most that we can in a friendship and be understanding of what our friends can give in return.
  8. Cherish the Moments Anyway. So you guys only speak a few times a month. Cherish the short moments anyway. Because we are becoming much more layered with our lives of love, career and all things complicated, many of us simply don’t have as much time as we use too. Thats ok. Whatever moments you have with your friends, cherish it anyway.
  9. Let it Go. Some relationships are only for a season. Tyler Perry has a beautiful monologue in his play “Madea Goes to Jail,” which compares friendships to a tree. Some people are leaves who are just there for a season, others are branches who will stay only until the weathers gets too bad, and then you have your roots who are there to support you no matter the storm. Be thankful for your roots and be content with letting go of your leaves and branches.

Getting a handle on this adult thing is already challenging. Facing these challenges with folks who truly love and support you, make you smile, and bring absolute peace to your life can be incredibly easy if you let it be. Do something fun with your friends,find that song that makes you all go crazy and dance like it’s the last night you are going to be there together, go out for a night on the town, get matching tattoos, gossip about your favorite men, go shopping together, go on an amazing road trip together, just have fun and create memories..

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Oh To Be Free..

lana

Have you ever felt like you were born in the wrong place, the wrong era, the wrong time?!? Like the people around you, the people in the space that you exist in just do not understand the workings of your brain, your heart your soul, your every being?

Like you are just not living the life that you should? Like there is a greater purpose and you are just wasting your time with the current life that you are living?

Maybe like, dare I say, you just don’t belong? Cliche I know but I have no other way to put it..

Like you are living for everyone else but yourself, living a lie, day in and day out pretending to be someone that you aren’t just to please the people around you, to make them happy, content, comfortable with the you that you are parading around. Just so they would not feel weary, uncomfortable with the real you. The weird you. The you that you hide from the rest of the world?!

Like anything that you say just sounds wrong, your ideas about the world, people, life are not acceptable?! Even though in your hearts of hearts they feel so damn right?!

Sometimes I feel like i’m losing my mind. Going absolutely bonkers. Just because I feel so trapped, like a tiger in a cage, just waiting for the chance to finally break free and go wild, be me…

But then, then you meet that one person, or you see them on TV, or online, or hear that one song, that just gets you you know? That just describes you to a T.. And then you don’t feel so alone anymore..

Like there could be hope, somewhere, out there in this vast, great, big earth, that you will finally be home.. Finally find your people. Finally live, and not just exist, taking everyday as it comes?… For me that person, that song, that moment was when I discovered Lana Del Rey. And my all time favorite song of hers is  Ride.

I cant wait for that day when i’m finally free of all these flippin, ooh hell we are all adults here, fucking shackles.. And I can freely from the society, from the expectations..free to be me… 🙂

*sigh* I know I must sound like a blabbering idiot, but I just wanted to let out my feelings in an environment that I know I won’t be too harshly judged for my craziness and all around oddness..

Passion..

A person who has a passionate soul can not change who they are.. It surfaces into all areas of their lives, A passion who speaks, acts and breathes passionately can not be tamed..

Everything affects them wholly and completely… Music.. art… words…dance… feelings.. It all overly affects them

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They are naturally inquisitive.. They question everything.. sometimes to a point of exasperation. Until they find what their soul is searching for…

Their highs are insanely high,lifting them up to the peaks of the clouds..
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And their lows are gut wrenchingly low, burying them deep beneath the cold ground..
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One might say they are over baring, that they are clingy, or maybe dramatic.. But the truth is they just feel every single soluble of emotion to the very deepest of their core.. They love passionately..They mourn with fervor… They go through life with an unstoppable, unbreakable zeal..

Men Kicked Out Of Saudi Arabia For Being Ridiculously Good Looking ..

Three men attending the annual Jenadrivah Heritage and Culture Festival in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia have been kicked out for being too good looking… Too Handsome for a festival!

The Arabic Elaph newspaper reports the man were thrown out by religious police as it was believed they were just too irresistible, and the local women folk who are forbidden from interacting with men outside of the family, would not be able to control themselves.

Jezebel claims to have lifted the veil on one of the trio ,Without further ado, meet Omar Borkan Al Gala, a photographer, actor and poet from Dubai.

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Though he has not yet confirmed he was indeed one of the infamous three, Al Gala has modestly posted a link to the original news report on his Facebook page, along with such musings as: “The beauty of a woman must be seen from in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides.” Sigh.

Emirates 24/7 states the three men in question were delegates at a stand promoting the UAE, which had attracted the attention of the religious police due to the unexpected presence of a female Emirati artist.

A spokesman for the UAE delegation issued a statement confirming: “Her visit to the UAE stand was a coincidence as it was not included in the programme which we had already provided to the festival’s management.”

Arabian Business, which has also fingered Al Gala as being one of the trio, points out the strictly conservative Sunni Muslim society prohibits women from interacting with unrelated males.

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As ridiculous as this sounds, if your going to get kicked out of anywhere for anything, let it be for that reason. Because although you’re being excluded, it’d be hard to take offence from that. 😀

Do You Believe In Soul Mates?

Today’s post is short and to the point.. 😀

Do you believe in soul mates?
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That there is one special person out there that you are destined to meet and fall hopelessly and shamelessly in love with?
That there is one human being out there in this big world that fate has kept for you and for you alone?
The thing is i am a hopeless romantic, I believe in one time love, a kind of love that drags you by the heart towards that person that you just cant be away from..
The kind of love that lasts a life time even if the other person dies..
I believe one can not love more than 1 person and that when one finds this love their life suddenly makes sense..
The kind of love that. rocks the very world that you live in..
The kind of love that’s filled with passionate embraces, lustful glances, stolen kisses out of this world earth shattering love making..
The kind of love that binds two souls together in a fevered dance of the heart..
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So my question to you is.. Do you believe in soul mates?
Because I do and I have found mine.. 🙂

Let’s get personal…

I hardly ever talk about anything personal on this blog, but today merits a bit of intimacy i believe! 😀

anni

Today is my five year anniversary with my boyfriend! Yes.. 5 Years.. WOOOWW! It seems like a long time when i say it out loud, but it feels like we have just met. It feels like we have been dating just for a short time, still exploring and discovering new things about each other every single day.

Let me give a little back story to our world whirl relationship. We met during my first year in University, just 3 months after I began studying and the day we met I knew we were destined to be. It probably sounds sappy, but anyway, we met, we clicked and we have been together ever since.

It was hard at times, filled with fights, misunderstandings and general confusion as can be when two strangers get to know each other. But we always got through it, and we always ended up loving each other more afterwards and this has been the best 5 years of my life, the happiest I have ever been and I never thought it was possible to love someone this much until I met him. And I’m pretty sure he will not read this, he never much checks out this blog, but thats ok. I just felt a need to scream it to the world that I am in love and it’s been five years and I hope to celebrate man more years to come with him. 😀

Couple in Bed

 

Happy anniversary my handsome, sweet, lovely, amazing bf! I love you more than words can say.    😀

p.s that is not us in the picture. 🙂

International Women’s Day

A woman is beauty..

A woman is strength..

A woman is power..

A woman is hope..

A woman is love..

A woman is the future..

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Today is International women’s day, International Women’s Day (IWD), originally called International Working Women’s Day, is marked on March 8 every year. In different regions the focus of the celebrations ranges from general celebration of respect, appreciation and love towards women to a celebration for women’s economic, political and social achievements.

In many parts of the world women are abused, treated like second class citizens  raped, and just plain disrespected and not loved the way they are supposed to be.

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On this International Women’s Day let women embrace themselves in multiple identities and complexities. Each of us embodies many realities all at the same time. The same woman who may be raped is also a mother, a professional worker, a migrant labourer, or…. None of our issues should be singularised although there are times they need priority.

This said, it is time in 2013 to recognise us as a sexual class across the globe. Women as a sexual class inhabit the diverse politics of living in a female body with its many colours, races, genders and classes. As such this sexual class is not unitary, but rather poly-versally united.

International Women’s Day started in the early 1900s – mostly by Socialist Parties to recognise the paid “work” of women. The Soviet Union was famous for its rhetoric of “sexual equality”, while demanding triple days of labour from its women. Today, women across the globe work for wages as teachers, soldiers, civilians, warriors, doctors, nurses, medical-aides, lawyers, paralegals, domestic labourers, cooks, sex-workers, chefs, janitors, migrants and more.

 

These women are also daughters mothers, sisters, wives, partners, single, gay, straight, trans, rich, poor, middle class, slum-dwellers and homeless – while struggling and achieving – with cancer and without cancer; with AIDS and without AIDS; disabled or fully abled; in war zones and not. They come in all colours and design. No woman is ever simply/singularly female, but it is always of consequence that she is.

Common struggles

Women – in all their cacophonous variety have enormous potential power as labourers, child-bearers and child-rearers, and sustainers of everyday life. Patriarchy and misogyny struggle to control and contain this power.

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If women were not as powerful as they also are sometimes powerless, we would simply be ignored. Instead, we are wrapped in blue cloth from head to toe, we are kept away from education, we are controlled to use right to divorce and right to control our bodies – abortion and contraception – only because those who dominate us fear our potential power and creativity; glass and cement ceilings keep us curtailed. You do not bother oppressing those who do little and are only capable of less.

Women are bound together by what they share, and also often pulled apart by their differences. Yet, there are common struggles: against sexual violence, for daycare and child-care supports; against unequal pay and for an end to sexual ghettos. Commonality does not require sameness.

In other words, women, in all their inter sectional diversity and individuality, must be recognized as a sexual class across racial and economic divides, with shared interests in order to be treated with full humanity. The women in Tahrir Square and in the streets of Tunisia demanded their human rights for themselves and all Egyptians and Tunisians alike. Their female bodies spoke of their sexual status, while they claimed their poly and universal rights to occupy the public streets. They chose not to be defined simply by their sexual status, but to claim that women’s rights are human rights.

Embrace women and girls – their bodies, their labor  their love, their “civilian” suffering in war, their hauling of water, their gathering of wood, their amazing creativity, their planting of trees, their protection of the environment, their stand against fracking, their fight to maintain abortion rights and other reproductive freedoms, their bravery in public and private spaces – anywhere and everywhere across this globe.

The Passion of Dance fine art ballerina portrait oil painting Drew Jacoby of Lines Ballet

For more on International women’s day you can visit this site.

http://www.internationalwomensday.com/

Resolution Going Good..

Resolutions..ooh resolutions..

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I’m sure by this time of the year most people have already discarded them to the side to never again be done until the end of the year when they will make the same resolution they have been making for the past 5 years. 😀

That is why i generally make it a point to never make one, because i can’t handle that much pressure, everyday thinking about ” Oh my gosh, if i dont complete or stick through with my resolution i shall once again be a failure”

But this year i thought, what the heck, it’s time i tried to make a resolution. But, i just didnt tell it to anyone, ( you know in case i fail at it :-D). Needless to say, so far so good. i have almost completed my resolution, albeit it was a small one, and it’s not even the middle of the year yet. YEEYY me!

My resolution for 2013 was…. **drum role please**

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To get more people around me to read more novels.. 😀  You might be thinking why in the world would i want more people to read?!! :-/

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The truth is i am a book lover, one might say i am addicted to book, some even call me a bookaholic.. But i simply love reading novels, of all genres, and the people around me wonder why i am obsessed with reading. I feel it is becoming a lost hobby, people are turning more to the internet, and movie watching. i think the best and most enjoyable way to enjoy a story is to read it, you get the true effect of the story, you picture the characters in your head the way you want them, you see the story the way it was intended to be seen. It is just a fulfilling love of mine and i wanted to share it more with my loved ones.

my aim was to get at least 6 people i know to start reading a book and finish it completely. And so far i have gotten 5 people ( yes that many) to start reading a particular book (which i myself fell completely in love with and even re read once more) and they are all close to finishing it, once in a while checking in with me and telling me how good it is and they didnt expect that.. 😀

The main task at hand was to find a book that i knew would completely capture them in its addictive story so much that they will not be able to put it down. They will be forced to finish it. And i found the perfect book, one lil hot number y non other than Miss James herself 😉

So what about all you lovelies out there?! Did you make a resolution?! and if yes how far have you gone with it? 🙂

Sexy, Dominating, Obsessive Men Of Our Dreams..

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By that i mean the men women fantasize or wish their men to be like. I believe this because leading men all the delicious, sexy, romantic novels that women become addicted to always have the same traits/ characteristics.Christian Grey (Fifty Shades of Grey), Gideon Cross (Crossfire trilogy), Jeremiah Hamilton (Anything he wants), Elijah Reynolds(A hunger so wild), Lieutenant David Colyear ( Almost a scandal), Roman Reynolds(Temptation Rising).. I could go on the whole night..  😀

gideon

It seems powerful, dominating, broody, obsessively protective,controlling,over bearing, overly  jealous, billionaires with incredible sexpertise are what we women are looking for. A man who would love you so deeply and so completely you become his sole focus, his sole possession  so much that he would do anything for you,he must have you, any time, any place, he would do anything to you *naughty grin*. He would love you so much he would die for you, want to spend every second of every day worshiping at your feet (of course topping all the time).

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But would these men’s irrational, sometimes stalkerish ways work in the real world?! Would their power be as attractive as in the books? not to mention the fact that they come bearing more than enough  baggage for the relationship to actually work.. But what can i say, as women this is what we are addicted to, this is what we crave, for someone to make all the decisions, for someone to love us so much it stifles us, For someone who longs so very much for you they can hardly stay away from you,  for someone to put everything and everyone else in their lives just so that they can some and meet our every need, our every desire.. But again i ask, would this work in realistic terms?!

sylvia

Ladies is this the kind of man you long for? 🙂