Tag Archives: stalker

International Women’s Day

A woman is beauty..

A woman is strength..

A woman is power..

A woman is hope..

A woman is love..

A woman is the future..

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Today is International women’s day, International Women’s Day (IWD), originally called International Working Women’s Day, is marked on March 8 every year. In different regions the focus of the celebrations ranges from general celebration of respect, appreciation and love towards women to a celebration for women’s economic, political and social achievements.

In many parts of the world women are abused, treated like second class citizens  raped, and just plain disrespected and not loved the way they are supposed to be.

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On this International Women’s Day let women embrace themselves in multiple identities and complexities. Each of us embodies many realities all at the same time. The same woman who may be raped is also a mother, a professional worker, a migrant labourer, or…. None of our issues should be singularised although there are times they need priority.

This said, it is time in 2013 to recognise us as a sexual class across the globe. Women as a sexual class inhabit the diverse politics of living in a female body with its many colours, races, genders and classes. As such this sexual class is not unitary, but rather poly-versally united.

International Women’s Day started in the early 1900s – mostly by Socialist Parties to recognise the paid “work” of women. The Soviet Union was famous for its rhetoric of “sexual equality”, while demanding triple days of labour from its women. Today, women across the globe work for wages as teachers, soldiers, civilians, warriors, doctors, nurses, medical-aides, lawyers, paralegals, domestic labourers, cooks, sex-workers, chefs, janitors, migrants and more.

 

These women are also daughters mothers, sisters, wives, partners, single, gay, straight, trans, rich, poor, middle class, slum-dwellers and homeless – while struggling and achieving – with cancer and without cancer; with AIDS and without AIDS; disabled or fully abled; in war zones and not. They come in all colours and design. No woman is ever simply/singularly female, but it is always of consequence that she is.

Common struggles

Women – in all their cacophonous variety have enormous potential power as labourers, child-bearers and child-rearers, and sustainers of everyday life. Patriarchy and misogyny struggle to control and contain this power.

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If women were not as powerful as they also are sometimes powerless, we would simply be ignored. Instead, we are wrapped in blue cloth from head to toe, we are kept away from education, we are controlled to use right to divorce and right to control our bodies – abortion and contraception – only because those who dominate us fear our potential power and creativity; glass and cement ceilings keep us curtailed. You do not bother oppressing those who do little and are only capable of less.

Women are bound together by what they share, and also often pulled apart by their differences. Yet, there are common struggles: against sexual violence, for daycare and child-care supports; against unequal pay and for an end to sexual ghettos. Commonality does not require sameness.

In other words, women, in all their inter sectional diversity and individuality, must be recognized as a sexual class across racial and economic divides, with shared interests in order to be treated with full humanity. The women in Tahrir Square and in the streets of Tunisia demanded their human rights for themselves and all Egyptians and Tunisians alike. Their female bodies spoke of their sexual status, while they claimed their poly and universal rights to occupy the public streets. They chose not to be defined simply by their sexual status, but to claim that women’s rights are human rights.

Embrace women and girls – their bodies, their labor  their love, their “civilian” suffering in war, their hauling of water, their gathering of wood, their amazing creativity, their planting of trees, their protection of the environment, their stand against fracking, their fight to maintain abortion rights and other reproductive freedoms, their bravery in public and private spaces – anywhere and everywhere across this globe.

The Passion of Dance fine art ballerina portrait oil painting Drew Jacoby of Lines Ballet

For more on International women’s day you can visit this site.

http://www.internationalwomensday.com/

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My Heart Is Bleeding For Amanda Todd..

I don’t have much to say other than i am in pain to see that a child can be bullied so much so that she ends up seeing the only way out as killing herself. I know i might be a little late to this story, but i just had to say something after i saw that video. I could not stop crying for days on end for the pain that this girl had to struggle through.

Amanda’s ordeal began at the age of 12 when she was fooling around with friends and lifted her her top for someone on the other end of a webcam.

The person was not a boy of her age though, but a suspected paedophile from across the border in America, who went on to terrorize her right up until her death.

“The Internet stalker she flashed kept stalking her,” said Ms Todd. “Every time she moved schools he would go undercover and become a Facebook friend.

“He went online to the kids who went to (the new school) and said that he was going to be a new student – that he was starting school the following week and that he wanted some friends and could they friend him on Facebook.

“He eventually gathered people’s names and sent Amanda’s video to her new school.”

The video and photos went to teachers and parents as well as pupils.

The bullies began to taunt her with names such as “porn star” and Amanda became anxious, withdrawn and desperate to avoid going to lessons.

Police were never able to track her stalker down, but they did trace the messages to the United States.

Despite their investigations though, the man continued to stalk Amanda, and even threatened to circulate the pictures again unless she gave him another “show”.

She refused so he carried out his threat, and her pain was amplified by her classmates who it’s claimed shared the photos on their cellphones.

She was verbally abused and beaten up.

“Everything she said in the video happened over the past two years,” said Ms Todd. “It was horrendous. I think about it now and I think, ‘Oh my God. How did she survive this long with the pain?’ ”

Amanda had made previous attempts to take her own life, but Ms Todd said that in the weeks leading up to her death she had begun to feel “normal” again, doing things like going to the mall with friends again.

I seriously can not stop thinking how is it that no one around her realized what was going on in her life? How is it that the kids who were bullying her were never stopped? It just makes me see how very little we as humans pay attention to others. I will let the video speak for its self..

Watch Amanda’s video below: Warning – graphic content

Amazingly even after death Amanda is still being bullied..I do not not what kind of world we live in where people still try to hurt those who have left this world.

 

I pray for her family and for all the other families who have lost a child to bullying..

Stalkers And Secret Admirers..

Today i thought i should talk about something different, stalkers and secret admirers. Why do people become stalkers or secret admirers, even more importantly why do some people have stalkers!! I have had the experience of having someone actually stalk me, for me it was a very weird and somewhat scary experience. The girl was in love with me, but i did not feel the same for her at all ( i mean seeing as i am not attracted to girls and all). But it was a very traumatizing and stressful situation.

People characterized as stalkers may have a mistaken belief that another person loves them, or that they need rescuing.Stalking can sometimes consist of an accumulation of a series of actions which in themselves can be legal, such as calling on the phone, sending gifts, or sending emails. ( and i have experience all of the above, receiving email, phone calls, pictures of me taken when i didnt even know it, weird gifts) i mean name it i experienced it.. :-/

Despite a growing body of research in the past five years, stalking is still very misunderstood by the public, the courts and law enforcement. For practical purposes there are three types of stalking. Relationship stalking occurs when a couple breaks up. But that is not stalking in a legal sense. It just looks like and feels like stalking. Obsessional stalking develops because of the way the couple interacted and the way they broke up. Obsessional stalking is a psychological problem that has many causes but in general it is the result of an “on again” and “off again” relationship as was well as a “desire and fear of a relationship” in one person and “fear of separation and loss” in the other. The childhood of at least one these people is usually emotionally barren or emotionally abusive. Delusional stalking occurs when a mental disorder causes the person to become obsessed or fixated on some unsuspecting person because of what amounts to a medical condition.

Moving on, secret admirers arent really different from stalkers by my believe. I think the only difference is that we some how know that the secret admirers wont actually ever hurt us, or hurt other people because of their professed love for us.

secret admirer is an individual who feels adoration, fondness or love for another person without disclosing their identity to that person. The admirer may often send gifts or love letters to their crush. A secret admirer is usually benign. Mostly, the goal of a secret admirer is to woo the object of their affections, and then to reveal their identity, paving the way for a real relationship.

The best way to deal with a stalker is to remove yourself from the stalker’s reach. This should be your first priority. Cut off all communication with the stalker. Avoid responding. As for the Secret admirer i guess it all depends on whether you want to know who that person is or not, and whether you will want to get to know them more or not, if you are curious, then you can go ahead and meet your secret admirer or if you are not interested, you can just ignore them and not respond to their letters and invitations. 😀

Now im not sure why i have had both a stalker( luckly only one) and secret admirer ( i have had about 4 now).. but below is a picture of some letters i have gotten from both my stalker and secret admirers.. can you tell which one is which ? 🙂